Since it was such a nice day today, I decided to check the perimeter on my hall duty today. I usually go out one of the doors in the back and walk around to the front. This is what I found lodged in the door on my way out…
That’s my new mindset for the rest of the year. I’m the Teflon Teacher. None of the whiny comments are going to stick to me. I’m not taking the blame for their grades either. With 15 student contact days remaining, the shit is fast approaching the fan. For some, it’s still a little too soon for it to actually hit the fan. They wait until the very end.
The kid that thinks that it’s my fault that he doesn’t get it does not get to have his little blame game affect me. He’s been gone for 10 days and he has this affliction known as senioritis. I’m sorry that you’re too lazy to get out of bed and that makes you late for school and therefore you miss my class. Bummer for you. Do you do your homework? Do you put forth some effort outside of class? Oh, was that a “no” to both of those questions? Darn. Then I guess the grade you’re getting is the grade you deserve.
What? You can’t get a D? Well, guess what? You do D work and that’s what you’ve earned. Yes, you’re a nice kid. But “nice” does not equal an “A” when you’re missing 5 assignments and have a D average on your tests. Sorry, welcome to the real world.
How did we get into this mess where we’ve sugar coated everything? Can they handle the truth? If the only way they can handle it is to blame someone else for their shortcomings, then I don’t think that they can. Some are going to have a pretty rude awakening very soon.
I know that I put forth great effort into teaching them. I’m prepared each day. I help them after school. I show them by example, what is good work and what is not. They know. And if they don’t by now, they get what they deserve. I don’t necessarily make it easy to get an A. But I do make it easy enough, so if they put forth effort and have a decent attitude, they should be able to pass.
So if they try to blame me for their problems, I’m thinking of one word. Teflon. None of that crap is going to stick to me.
I’ve been using a dating service lately. The idea is that they set you up with someone they think will be compatible with you. They do all the work. They screen the candidates, do background checks, set up the date, etc. All you have to do is show up and have a friendly conversation with the date over drinks, lunch or dinner.
My contract is up with #20. I was guaranteed 15 dates or however many they could fit in a year. I did go on hold for about 6 months, which included last summer. I can only handle the dating thing for so long until I need a break. So in the first 6 months I had 10 dates and the second 6 months I had 10 more. With how much this service costs, it weeds out a lot of people. You also know that they are indeed single. With many on-line services, you can’t be guaranteed they’re telling the truth or representing themselves truthfully.
I’ve tried two online services. On yahoo.com personals, I had good luck and met a nice man. It didn’t work, but we parted ways and remain friends. The other, I didn’t meet anyone that I met for more than a few dates. That one I even had a strange situation where one of the guys’ ex-girlfriends was hacking into his account and sending his interests strange emails warning us about the guy. These messages were sent from a guy interested in dating men. Later I saw that the profile had been changed to a woman’s profile. Even though I reported the problem to match.com they didn’t do anything about it. So I’m a bit soured on them. After these experiences I decided to try the big bucks dating service. After all, I have a friend who used this service and she’s marrying the guy that they matched her up on her first date! They’re a perfect match. So it obviously works for someone!
One thing that creeps me out about these on line sites is that you can see who is looking at your profile. I’m sure that I’ll sound shallow… but many times, it is old, creepy looking, overweight men, that are separated. I’m sorry, but if you can’t keep up with me hiking the Inca Trail, we’re probably not a match. Plus, I have a thing with age. Some people say that love has no age limits. C’mon! I don’t want to date my father! Ick. Plus, as a teacher, the idea of dating someone young enough to be a student of mine at some point (which means 8 years younger, given I started teaching when I was 26) is just plain something that I can’t handle. Blech…
Most of the men that are on these sites that are my age are not interested in dating women their own age. They want women that are younger than them. It doesn’t help that Hollywood perpetuates the idea that men that are maybe a 5 or 6 think that they can get a woman that is a 9 or 10. Look at how many sit-coms have the guy with the skinny, hot, wife, when the guy is not anywhere close to that. Oh yeah… It must be their personality. Once again, I’m sure I sound like I’m completely shallow.
At the end of my year long experiment (that has really lasted a year and a half) I am not anywhere closer to finding someone special. Maybe that’s ok. I have learned that I’m pretty awesome by myself. What else have I learned?
1. I can talk to anyone about anything, no matter how uncomfortable the situation.
2. No matter how good he sounds, it’s always a crap shoot.
3. A lot of people are afraid to ask people out/introduce themselves and therefore use services like this.
4. There are a lot of socially awkward people out there.
5. There’s a reason why many of them are still single. (Of course, that could be said about me, too.)
6. I think a lot of people are looking to be with anyone, instead of a particular someone.
7. I’m now good at breaking things off. I should publish my standard “dump” email in another post.
8. I know in my gut if there’s a chance or not that things will go further.
9. You have to be picky. This is the rest of your life!
10. My single life is pretty damned good!
I haven’t actually met #20 yet. As usual, he sounds good. He’s 43, 6′1″, brown hair, blue eyes, never married, no kids, works in bonds/investments downtown, comes from a family of five and has similar interests as me. Since I’ve been on so many of these, my expectation level is in the gutter. He’s probably a Republican, given that he works in bonds/investments. You know that’s not good if you’ve read some of my other posts…
So what am I going to do? I’ll meet him and see how it goes. I’ll give him a fair chance. But I really think that I just need to move on and not think about it. I’ve got so much other cool stuff going on in my life. Heck! I’m learning how to Belly Dance! How cool is that?!? I’m going to Greece this summer! I still have to investigate what me and my friend are going to do on Crete before we we hop on a sailboat from Santorini to Mykonos for a week. My sister is having a baby in a month! I’m going to fall in love with another niece or nephew all over again. Life is too short to worry about trivial stuff like dating. I would rather be happy by myself than miserable with another person! And I really mean it!
Tonight was the last night of parent-teacher conferences for the year. Fourth quarter conferences seem more like a time to catch up with colleagues instead of talking to parents. How many parents came to see me? A whopping six. Yep. Three hours, six people. You do the math.
The parents that I talked to were ones that I needed to talk to. Two of the six were kids that were ditching my class on a regular basis. Two were parents of kids that are very easily distracted and are the typical kid that is behind in homework with a bad attitude towards math. One was the parent of a kid that is doing just fine. The last one is a parent that I’ve talked to before.
Some of our parents don’t speak English. On conference nights they line up interpreters that speak Hmong and Spanish. This mother had a Hmong interpreter with her. Like many older Hmong women, she was fairly short and has black hair. She had a slightly scrunched right side of her face and needed some dental work. I spoke to her about a year ago when I had her son in Algebra 2. Now, he’s in my Pre Calculus class. He’s one of the nicest kids. He’s the one that got the cake last Friday for my class - the one that didn’t know he should round down since he couldn’t find an “8″. Anyway… I’m speaking to the mom through the interpreter. You kind of wonder what is being interpreted sometimes. Part of the conversation sort of went like this:
Me: Steve is missing a few assignments. He can still turn them in. He has missed a few days of school. I think it’s because he was dismissed for not serving a Saturday school or two.
Interpreter: I don’t think she knows that.
Me to the Interpreter: Are we going to burst her bubble or not?
Interpreter shrugs his shoulders and translates.
Mom: Adfad ioh oijwen aoij oiuon wroin. Weoril soij i nigbno ewrboikd anofi wereyrb dsfoinap weroia efoin. Wernodyn erwoim we amoigh weri foiewm wfeo zfomtyu aerogu weoimfg fwe wepg rapoi wroigyw efviyrlyd sdfoyfg foiuf yoigy eigoy diwdi weo. dioug goirn goiuc todkht oiugm blah blah blah…. And on and on for what seemed like two minutes.
Translator: She’s disappointed.
For some reason, I don’t think there was much lost in translation.
Did you know that today is a holiday? It’s National Teacher Appreciation Day. Yep. News to you, huh? As a teacher, it’s sort of news to me too.
The idea of it is nice. But it’s always nicer when someone doesn’t have to be told to appreciate you. So how were we appreciated today? There were some bagels and bananas in the lounge (if you made it to the lounge). I didn’t look at the newspaper until I ate dinner tonight. The names of every teacher in my district were listed in a full two page layout. We also got an email from our union president and one from our superintendent. The one from the superintendent included a little video about how we’re all appreciated. The catch? You have to be a lip reader since our computers don’t have speakers. Well… at least most of the ones in my school…
Even though it’s this holiday, it seems kind of hollow. Well, not kind of hollow. Just plain hollow. We, like many districts, are experiencing some of the worst budget cuts since I started teaching. We appreciate you, here’s your pink slip. I’m not one of those teachers. I’ve actually got a comfortable amount of seniority. But for those that don’t, it sure doesn’t make for a fun spring.
It’s hard to be appreciated when you’re so used to being blamed for things beyond your control. I think I would rather have a day where people decide to be responsible for themselves and their kids.
Is it time to turn the heat off yet? It’s May 5th and I haven’t clicked it to the off position. I have it set low, so it doesn’t come on unless absolutely necessary. But I’m a little scared to flip the switch.
I decided to write about fluff today. There was an event at school where they looked at the Achievement Gap. Apparently there was a parent on the panel that basically just blamed the teachers for everything. So the day got off to a rather negative vibe. I’m glad I was not among the classes to attend the assembly. I can stay in my little happy bubble for a little while longer. I’m not ready to address that topic. Yes, there is a problem. But I really don’t feel like blaming teachers is the answer. So onto my fluff.
I’ve had to deal with “fluffy” the last 2 weeks, a.k.a. Whiskers, my parents’ cat. My parents come home tomorrow from a trip to Italy. It’s pretty fantastic that they were able to take the trip considering my dad had a triple bypass in February. Since it was in the 60s today and I got my bike tuned up over the weekend, I went green and biked over there.
I got my bike about a year ago. Since my parents live only about 3 miles away from me, it’s an easy ride and only takes about 15 minutes. Whenever I ride, I feel like a kid. I strap on my helmet, put on my gloves and away I ride.
You’re lucky I didn’t have my camera today. What can I say? The cat is OLD. He’s older than my students. He’s just a few months shy of twenty. I go over there every other day or so. I give him fresh water, double check that he has enough food, change the litter when needed and clean up the puke. He’s a great cat. He’s nice to cuddle up with. But the puke? Ugh. He gets locked in the kitchen in an effort to save the carpet. How long do cats typically live? Whiskers is a completely indoor cat. Anyone know anything?
So… that’s my little bit of fluff. I’m not ready to let the happy bubble burst.
How old are you Ms B?
Yesterday I was asked this question. I’m not a good liar so I said, “I’ll be 38 tomorrow.”
What? It’s your birthday tomorrow? Can we have a party?
No. What’s the point of that? We’ll be learning things like usual.
Can we bring some chips and pop?
Well, if you want to…
It’s my Pre Calculus class. They’re a super nice bunch of kids. The funny thing about this is that the class is half girls and half boys. The ones that got all excited about it were the boys. They were dividing up who was going to bring chips, who would bring pop, who got the cups, etc. So I was expecting a few to stop by this morning and drop off their goodies for 2nd hour.
When 2nd hour rolled around we had more kids bringing in even more chips and cookies. I started setting everything out on the counter since we had plenty of junk food. I asked if they wanted to get some food before we went over the homework or after. They said that it would be better to do it after. It’s too distracting to get it ahead of time.
We went about our business of working out logarithmic and exponential equations from yesterday’s homework. Then, what happens? The ear-splitting fire alarm goes off. We all dutifully file out of the building and wait in the parking lot in the drizzle for the fire trucks to come. It was at least 10 minutes before we were back in the warmth of the building. We finished up the homework, took a short quiz and I told them there were no new notes for the day. (small cheer)
One student had pop in a refrigerator in a Science room. So he and another kid went to get the pop. It was taking them longer than I thought it would. So I started to go look for them. I got to the hall and another teacher motioned for me to go back to my room. So I confusingly went back.
These two that had left the room were recruiting nearby teachers to come and sing as they brought in a birthday cake. They even had candles! But the funny thing was that they had the wrong number! They made me a year older! Oh well… I can use the candles next year…
It was so sweet that they thought to get a cake. But the part I liked the best is the card. Somehow they found everyone (and then some) before class to sign it. And it’s a totally appropriate card since Snoopy is our school mascot. (yes, we’re the only school licensed to have Snoopy as our mascot)
This last quarter of the year, I really have some great students. They are really nice and fun to teach. I’m not saying that it’s a walk in the park all the time. But I don’t dread going to work at all. They make my job fun. We laugh, we learn. And today, we had cake.
Oh yeah… The reason why my age was wrong is that there wasn’t an “8″ candle at the store. They’re too young to realize that at this age, rounding DOWN is best.
After I had lunch today I was walking down the hallway and I saw a former student. He was talking to a couple of teachers. He was walking backwards as he talked to them, walking the other direction. I recognized him from behind and quickly determined that I wanted to avoid this one. As he turned around I passed right behind him and he never saw me. Whew!
I caught up with the other teachers and asked why this student was back. Apparently he’s running for office and is somehow trying to garner some support around his old high school. I’m not exactly sure who he was visiting. He’s running as a Republican and in general, they’re aren’t as many of them amongst the teacher folk.
I don’t know much about this former student since he graduated. I know he’s served three tours in Iraq. He’s the kind of kid that you figure would be a good fit for the military. I’m sure the discipline that it offered is probably exactly what he needed. I only know him from several years ago in my classes.
He wasn’t exactly a favorite. In fact, he was closer to the other end. It was a constant battle with him to show work on any math problems. He would turn in late work and it would routinely have just lists of answers that looked like they came directly from the back of the book. When I questioned him about it, he would deny any wrongdoing. He’s tests were all points I gave for effort - not for being correct. So maybe math wasn’t his thing. But at the time, honesty wasn’t either.
This kid had a knack for talking his way out of situations. I wonder how many detentions he got out of serving. He also could get a rise out of just about anyone. So his discipline record wasn’t too clean. Taking responsibility was fairly unknown at that time too. He was one of those kids that everyone looked forward to graduation and him moving on… and out the door. I remember a particularly clever prank at the faculty softball game. (Probably shouldn’t write about that one.)
So here we are, several years later. How much has he changed? I’m not sure. I avoided him based on the 18 year old that I once knew. I don’t live in the district in which he is running. So I won’t have to make any decision about voting for him. Well… I wouldn’t anyway based on political affiliation. I’m sure he has changed quite a bit based on his experiences in Iraq. Maybe he’s completely turned around. But I just can’t get over my image of him from years ago. I probably don’t have to… unless he gets elected.
It’s that time of year. You can feel the excitement throughout the entire week. On Friday, kids who have been ditching your class actually show up. Why? It’s Prom night.
Throughout the week you see and hear all of the signs of prom. They’re talking about their dresses, where they’re going to dinner, where they’re going afterwards, etc. Colors of their dresses aren’t the only colors that I’m noticing. The girls, themselves, are changing color. Some have turned that artificial orange/tan color. I saw another that just is too pale to try it and was sporting a very pink, painful looking sunburn. There’s a group of 25 couples that has rented a bus - the “party bus” as they call it.
It’s always interesting to see which kids are going together. One thing that is different from years ago is that you no longer have to have a date for prom. Kids go in groups. One group had six girls and one boy. Some even come by themselves. There’s always a group of Autistic kids that come with their teachers. They’re so cute, all dressed up and excited to be there.
I think I’ve chaperoned the Prom every year that I’ve been teaching. It’s always a fun evening. The kids are excited to be dressed up. They look fantastic. Some of them look so different that you hardly recognize them. It’s so nice to see the boys with pants that have the waist AT their waist! The dresses are in every color of the rainbow. Many are very tasteful and the girls look gorgeous. There are always a few that give you that crinkled brow reaction. Sometimes you see a dress and you are fearful the whole night that something might fall out of the dress. (Yes, something did at the end, but I was fortunate enough to miss it!)
The dancing is another story. They all seem to know the bump and grind type of dancing. Can you call it dancing? I feel like I should avert my eyes. When they’re doing that type of dancing and it’s really explicit, we’re supposed to go and tap them on the shoulder to get them to stop. Well… I’m not exactly comfortable with doing that. It’s partly because I think they’d look at me and just laugh if I tried. It’s more effective when an Assistant Principal does it. After a few songs in a row with the bump and grind beat, one of the AP’s went to the DJ and asked if he could change it up to something not as conducive to the B&G. The next song you hear? That Cotton Eyed Joe song. There’s nothing like country music to break that up!
You can tell if the Prom was a success by how many kids are around at the end. The DJ even remarked that he was impressed that so many kids stayed until the very end. So at 11:30 they all gathered their purses, discarded shoes and their coats and off they went. I prefer not to think about what happens after prom. I’ll just keep in mind the group that was going bowling and stay in my happy place…
